How to Deal with a Divorce You Didn’t Want
Learning that your spouse wants a divorce when you do not can be difficult to accept. You can feel disappointed, frustrated, angry, or uncertain about what comes next. While you cannot force your spouse to remain married, you can make decisions that protect your financial future, your children, and your peace of mind.
When Only One Spouse Wants a Divorce
In Florida, one spouse can move forward with a divorce even if the other spouse does not agree. If your spouse has decided to end the marriage, your divorce will eventually happen. The question is not whether the divorce will occur, but what will the process and outcome look like.
Many people who do not want a divorce, spend a significant amount of time trying to stop the divorce process. While those feelings are understandable, delaying matters will possibly only increase emotional strain and legal expenses without changing the outcome.
Think Carefully Before Choosing Conflict
When emotions are running high, it may feel tempting to fight every issue in court. However, prolonged litigation will create financial consequences that affect both you and your spouse, not to mention your children.
Going to court frequently involves multiple professionals, extended hearings, and ongoing legal fees. As costs increase, the amount of money available to divide between you and your spouse will decrease. The longer a divorce is in litigation, more money is being spent on resolving disputes rather than preserving your family’s assets for the future.
The Benefits of Collaborative Divorce and Mediation
Even if you are unhappy about the reality of your divorce, Collaborative Divorce and mediation provide the best opportunities to resolve issues privately and efficiently.
In a Collaborative Divorce, you work with divorce professionals to gather financial information, discuss concerns, and negotiate settlement terms. Rather than hiring separate experts for every issue, you have neutral professionals to help evaluate finances, children’s issues and other matters. This reduces expenses and keeps the focus on the solution.
Another advantage is privacy. Instead of your personal matters getting into the public record, you and your spouse have greater control over how your divorce issues are resolved.
Giving Yourself Time to Adjust
Accepting an unwanted divorce will not happen overnight. Collaborative Divorce and mediation can create space for productive conversations while allowing you time to process what is happening. This allows you to make thoughtful decisions rather than react solely from emotion.
Focus on Your Future
Living with ongoing conflict rarely benefits anyone involved. It affects your emotional well-being, impacts your children, and will significantly increase costs.
Although you may not want a divorce, you still have choices regarding how the process unfolds. Focusing on resolution rather than conflict will preserve financial resources, protect your privacy, and allow you to begin building the next chapter of your life sooner.
Contact the Law Offices of Robert J. Merlin
How you handle a divorce you did not ask for will affect your financial future, your family relationships, and your peace of mind. The Law Offices of Robert J. Merlin focus on helping families resolve matters privately and respectfully through Collaborative Divorce, mediation, and negotiated settlements. To schedule a consultation, call Robert Merlin at (305) 448-1555 or contact us online.
The Law Offices of Robert J. Merlin, P.A. are located at 250 Catalonia Ave., Suite 706, Coral Gables, Florida 33134.
FAQs
1. Can I stop my spouse from getting a divorce if I do not agree to it?
A divorce does not require both spouses to agree. If one spouse wants to end the marriage, the divorce will proceed. The primary issue becomes how the issues involved in the divorce will be resolved.
2. Is Collaborative Divorce a good option even if I do not want the divorce?
Yes. Collaborative Divorce allows you to participate in shaping the outcome while reducing conflict, protecting privacy, and limiting unnecessary expenses.
3. Will going to court help me get a better result?
No. Even when you and your spouse disagree about divorce, Collaborative Divorce and mediation still provide a better more productive path toward resolution. These out of court processes are designed to address difficult divorce issues without relying on courtroom litigation whenever possible, and these processes empower you to determine your future, instead of a judge who does not know you or your family.
Bob Merlin is a Florida Bar Board Certified Family Law Specialist, he practices in the areas of divorce, time-sharing of children and parenting plans, child support, alimony, paternity, pre-nuptial and post-nuptial agreements, and cohabitation/partnership agreements.
As an experienced Collaborative attorney, Bob continually hones his skills in the Collaborative Process and trains other professionals how to become a Collaborative professional as he is.
“My goal is to help divorcing and other family law clients make well-informed decisions so they experience a more efficient process and feel more in control over their futures.”
